Wednesday, January 27, 2010

A Veronica in a World of Heathers

so i'm sitting here, monacle in place with my electronic quill and journal ready to pour my heart out and let my angst fly. i accompanied hex to his lapbandcamp seminar and it was annoying. every stupid and/or annoying llama decided to attend as well. o.m.g. i was ready to start smackin' dolts upside the head with my flip flops! when the doctor says do not discuss your personal medical details in this room, save it for the office, he means DO NOT DISCUSS YOUR PERSONAL MEDICAL DETAILS IN THIS ROOM, SAVE IT FOR THE OFFICE! i don't need to know that you can't shit if you eat too much meat. i don't need to know if you're on psychotropic drugs that made you gain 100 lbs from taking one pill (when we all know you're lying and you probably wrapped that damn pill in bacon wrapped doughnuts coated in twinkie filling because we've all done it!!!) no one wants to touch your stomach! no one wants to see your stomach, put your shirt downn! i'm glad the lapband worked for you but PUT YOUR SHIRT DOWN! and if you cannot bathe on a regular basis and have some sort of aversion to anti-persperant, stay home! if you have 400 phlegm balls filling your lungs, STAY HOME! there was so much phlegm i threw up a little in my mouth!

now that that's out of my system, i did get some more items clarified and had some new questions answered as well. i am glad i went. i'm ready to meet with dr. c and get this show on the road! the only thing i worry about is giving up too much at once - i have to stop drinking when i go back to my shrinky-dink and then a few days later i'll have to give up carbs for a while for the surgery. it's worth giving up food, of course, but i hardly drink and when i do finally tie one on, it's always well worth the wait. if i quit smoking, i can quit drinking. i'd rather be stable and medicated than unstable and drunk every once in a while...i think ;)

still haven't found the keys...help me.
pax,
margo

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