the annoying "cheerleader" that was at hector's seminar last night who kept lifting up her shirt so people could feel her port and see her new (yet still unusually fleshy) belly said something interesting that night...she said, "expect people you thought were your friends to be so jealous they never speak to you again. expect your friends and family to try and sabotage you because of envy or control issues they have."
wow. that's pretty cold. but i can see it. i did it. when margie had her lapband a couple of years ago, i was so jealous my pupils looked like daggers. i am a bitch. i don't think that anymore. it's a fat girl thing, i guess. i can't explain it. when our friend marie had gastrick bypass and i found out she was forcing herself to eat double cheeseburgers that same week, i was secretly happy. i didn't want my fat girls to be skinny because i'd be alone again. am i a bitch? does that make me a horrible person? jack's ex-wife, smellanie, had gastrick bypass surgery and used to stand out on the smoker's patio at the chase call center and openly target anyone 50 lbs overweight or more and announce, "no one who weighs more than 250 lbs is happy. they couldn't possibly be happy because i wasn't...blah blah blah" when i saw her, i'd turn my back. i was openly a bitch to her just out of spite. when jack told me she gained all of her weight back and then some i couldn't have been happier. am i facing a nuclear winter of kharmic retribution because of past behaviors and evil thoughts? i love margie and i'm so happy she got healthy! i'm even going to see her this weekend with sylvia so they can give me the real scoop on dr.c and the procedure. i'm still glad smellanie's a cow, though, but for a zillion other reasons.
still can't find my keys...anyone wanna help me look?
:)
pax,
margo
Thursday, January 28, 2010
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